


Laying Down the Rules: The Family Edition

by LadyKae



Series: Rainy Days [3]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Embarrassed Teenagers, Established Relationship, F/M, Family Fluff, Good Parent Sabine Cheng, Good Parent Tom Dupain, Laying down the Rules, Mild Angst, Okay just one pun, Plagg is a Little Shit (Miraculous Ladybug), Post-Reveal Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Puns & Word Play, Sexual Humor, Tikki Is a Little Shit, Tom and Sabine give the kids "The Sex Talk", Worried Parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:55:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24668746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyKae/pseuds/LadyKae
Summary: Tom and Sabine sit Marinette and Adrien down with their kwamis to establish the new rules, one set for superhero-ing, the other for now that they're dating. It quickly devolves, heading into embarrassing and murky waters...Is it possible for two teens to spontaneously combust from shared embarrassment?
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Sabine Cheng/Tom Dupain
Series: Rainy Days [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1757320
Comments: 29
Kudos: 274





	Laying Down the Rules: The Family Edition

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Score](https://archiveofourown.org/works/6807724) by [KryallaOrchid](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KryallaOrchid/pseuds/KryallaOrchid). 



> I couldn't stop laughing while I was writing this! I hope you enjoy!

Marinette’s leg bounced against his and Adrien sighed heavily as he laid his hand on her knee to quell it. They were seated at the dinner table with Tom and Sabine across from them. Tikki and Plagg were seated on the table, munching away on cookies and cheese. 

“Before we get into the rules, Tom and I need to know your daily mornings and evenings at home, Adrien. In detail if you can manage,” Sabine said cheerfully as she poured everyone a cup of tea. 

“That’s easy enough. During the week, I have a six am wake up call with Nathalie every morning, and that’s the time we go over my schedule for the day. My modeling commitments are taking a back seat to my studies at this time, so I’m only averaging one or two shoots a week. Two days a week, I have either chinese lessons, fencing lessons, or I’m practicing playing the piano. As long as I meet those commitments, the rest of the evening is mine to do as I see fit,” Adrien replied with a shrug. “Otherwise, no one really checks up on me in my room, so no one knows if I’m sneaking out or not.”

Tom and Sabine shared a look between them before turning their attention back to the young couple. “We have two sets of rules. One for the two of you dating, the other for your superheroing,” Tom began. He sat up straight, taking a small sip of his tea as Plagg came up to rest on his shoulder. “Your grades are important in this last year of school, and we know you two have managed to keep on top of them even with all your responsibilities. Don’t let your relationship get in the way of that. While we don’t like the idea, Sabine and I will put a limit on dates and visits if we see either of yours slipping.”

“Speaking of dates. Adrien, I already told you this the other day, but from here on, if you drop Marinette off after a date, you’re to come inside so we can say goodnight to you as well,” Sabine continued with a twinkle in her grey eyes. “If you’re visiting and don’t come through the front door, we expect a text. I don’t care if it’s the middle of the night, we want to know you’re here.”

Both teens blushed crimson at that rule, and Adrien pulled at his collar. He had a feeling that was in response to last night. Their shared patrol ran late and Marinette pulled him in to sleep for a few hours before he slipped off for home at five thirty.

“Tikki, Plagg, you’re family too. You’re expected to be with us at dinner if you’re here and take part in the conversation,” Tom decreed with a clap of his hands. “On to the superhero rules now.”

Sabine let loose a heavy sigh as she swirled her cup in her hand and she looked between Marinette and Adrien with worry. “Keep open lines of communication with us. Text us after each akuma attack, so we know you four are alright. Text us before you transform if you can. If excuses are needed as to why you’re late getting back to the school, we’ll do our best to provide them.”

“The same applies to your patrols. This applies to both of you. Yes, you too, Adrien, even if you’re not here. Text us. Once before you go out. Once after you’ve gotten back. If you’re running late, text us. Adrien, if it’s too late or the weather’s bad enough to keep you from going home, call us and come here. Sabine and I will get you up in time to beat your wake up call from Nathalie,” Tom said. “We know you two do them to keep the people’s morale up. We just want to know you’re safe.”

“In the event either of you are injured on patrol, come straight here. Tom and I have been taking first aid courses on the weekends and we have a fully stocked emergency first aid kit,” Sabine added. She reached over the table, laying her hands over theirs in a comforting gesture. “You have us now, and we’re going to do everything we can to help you.”

Tom laid his hand on his wife’s shoulder, giving the two teens a beaming grin. “Which brings us to the last rule. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask. Need an ear to listen? Sabine is wonderful for that. Need a way to vent some frustration? I’ll have you pounding dough until your arms hurt,” he said.

“If contraceptives are needed, we’ll help you with those too,” Sabine commented delicately.

Adrien choked on the next breath he drew in, rousing raucous cackles from Plagg as he sputtered in disbelief. 

Oh god…

“Contraceptives?” Adrien squawked, his green eyes blown wide. His eyes cut to the side, hoping to seek some sort of comfort or support from Marinette.

Unfortunately for Adrien, Marinette was doubling over the table with a long, high pitched whine and her palms buried into her eyes. Her cheeks were as red as her suit, the blush creeping to the tops of her ears and well past the collar of her shirt. Adrien was positive he matched the image she made. 

“You know, rubbers, getting Mar-bear here on the pill?” Tom said as if it were the most natural thing in the world. “Which actually brings me to this, Adrien. I know the two of you have more—” The older man paused for a second, trying to find the best word possible to fit the situation.

Meanwhile, Marinette dissolved from digging her palms into her eyes as was thumping her head against the table, rattling the dishes. Adrien could feel the heat of her embarrassment radiating over to him, and he started doing the mental math needed to find out if she could, feasibly, spontaneously combust. 

If so, he’d be right behind her.

Tom snapped his fingers with a grin, his green eyes settling on Adrien fondly. “—options. The two of you have a wider range of options for where romantic liaisons can take place than most kids your age. The only thing I ask is that you always have protection on hand if the mood hits,” he stated carefully. His grin stretched into a toothy smile as he reached across the table, patting Adrien’s shoulder. “After all, we don’t need any kittens running around the bakery yet!”

Adrien felt as if he were choking on a particularly pungent piece of camembert, but he could understand their reasoning. For the love of the Miraculous, though, he was not expecting a safe sex talk!

“Though, knowing what we do know about your home life Adrien, if you need pointers on suiting up your Bananoir, I’ll be more than happy to set aside a time to—” Tom began.

Plagg’s cackle thundered through the room as he fell off Tom’s shoulder, and even Tikki was straining to keep her giggles in check. The ladybug kwami was practically glowing from the effort.

“No need, Tom!” he choked out. Plagg was never going to let him live this down. Adrien was quickly matching Marinette’s impressive shade of purple at this rate. 

What were the chances both of them would combust at the same time?

“On that same note, if both of you find that things are...Heating up between you while you’re here, just lock your door, Marinette. Your father and I will understand. We’ll try our best to give you two as much privacy as possible. Adrien, I’d set the same sort of system up with your father and Nathalie as well, if it’s an option,” Sabine finished. She finished her cup of tea with a smile and she looked between them once again. “I think that covers it. What do you think, Tom?”

Tom nodded in agreement and he got up from his seat. “Your maman and I need to get back down to the bakery and you two need to head back to school soon. Will we see you tonight for supper, Adrien?” he asked.

Adrien shook his head no, unable to meet the kind green eyes of his girlfriend’s father. “Nope...Got fencing and chinese today. Maybe Wednesday?” he offered, his voice muffled by the hand over his mouth.

“Sounds good, son. Have a good day, Plagg. Tikki, I’ve got a new recipe of cookies I need taste tested later if you don’t mind.”

“I’ll be happy to help, Tom. I hope you and Sabine have a wonderful rest of the day!” Tikki called out pleasantly as the two adults exited the apartment.

The door clicked shut and silence fell over the four for a few moments. Marinette still had yet to look up from the table. Adrien wondered if she managed to smother herself against the tablecloth.

“Pffffffttttt!”

Two sets of green eyes and one set of blue all latched onto the little red kwami as she held her sides.

“Oh sweet sugar cookies!” Tikki gasped as she dissolved into absolute gales of laughter. “Suiting up your Bananoir! Oh Adrien, I could have sworn you were going to—” Her voice trailed as she dissolved into further hysterics. At one point, she rolled off the edge of the table to the floor with Plagg, the two kwamis so far gone that they couldn’t even keep themselves airborne.

“I’m so sorry,” came Marinette’s muffled voice against the table.

Adrien chuckled a little as he took her hand. “Don’t be. At least we know they care, right?” He bumped his head against her shoulder, and Marinette turned to look at him. Adrien smirked as an idea came to mind and he resisted the urge to rub his palms together. “Besides, I think the only thing that’s going to put their minds at ease is if we show them that we’re listening.” 

Marinette’s head rose off the table as she recognized the look in Adrien’s eyes and the scheming tone in his voice. “What are you planning?” she asked.

“Nothing malicious. Again, just going to put their minds at ease, is all,” he replied with a wink. He got up from the table, walking around it to scoop up their still laughing kwamis. “Alright, enough of that, you two. You can laugh at our expenses later, okay? We need to get back to school.”

“Fine,” Plagg wheezed, wiping a tear from his eyes with one paw. “I’m don—Pffffftttt, no I’m not!”

Adrien rolled his eyes as he handed Tikki to Marinette. “I’ll feed you processed cheese for three weeks if you don’t stop,” he warned.

Plagg’s head whipped around so fast Adrien swore he heard the sound barrier break. “You wouldn’t dare,” he hissed.

Two sets of green eyes bore into each other, unflinching. 

“Try me,” Adrien countered. He looked to Marinette next with a grin. “Still got Alya’s gag gift from last Christmas?”

Marinette’s eyes seemed to perk up in understanding and she smiled. “I think I do. Need anything else?”

Adrien shook his head as he dug into his school bag for a pen. “Nope, just that. I’ll follow you back to the school momentarily, okay sweetness?” He hummed happily as Marinette turned his chin, pressing her lips to his.

“See you there, centerfold,” she replied.

* * *

Tom Dupain sighed as he trudged back up the stairs to the family apartment, wiping the lingering flour from his face. Marinette was out with Alya for the evening, meaning he and Sabine were in for a quiet night. He walked over to the kitchen sink to wash his hands, his mind set on something light and simple for supper, when he spotted something on the table. 

It was a note, folded in half and propped up like a tent to cover something at first. Picking it up, the corners of his mouth twitched as he glanced between the message and the banana on the table. 

_Tom,_

_With all due respect, when it comes to suiting up my Bananoir?_ _When the time comes,_ _I’ll have it covered._

A rather impressive likeness of the Mr. Banana face smiled up at him from the peel, with a bright red condom slipped over it.

Rich guffaws filled the room as Tom looked between the note and the banana again. “Well, that’s definitely one way to get the point across,” he murmured to himself. 

That boy was going to make the best damn son-in-law when he and Marinette got married.

His mirth was short lived as his phone blared out an akuma alarm and Tom reached into his pocket. Within seconds, he had two texts. A cat emoji and a ladybug emoji. His face was grim as he set the note and his phone down, though he was drawn from his thoughts as he heard Sabine enter. 

“Did they text you?” she asked, her voice worried. She crossed the room in a few steps, quite the feat for someone of her stature.

Tom grinned as he held up his phone. “Things are going to be fine, honey,” he said with pride as he showed her the messages. “They’re listening.”

**Author's Note:**

> I regret nothing 🤣


End file.
